Social & Domestic Issues

Adam Levine is what’s wrong with the modern male

Adam Levine is what’s wrong with the modern male

Adam Levine was named the SEXIEST MAN ALIVE by People magazine. Such recognition should be taken with the grain of vapid salt that is the entire concept, however, what women find appealing in a man is telling of our culture and thus politics, so it’s not a complete waste of time.

For those lucky enough not to have known of Adam Levine until now, here’s a little about him: He is the lead singer of the band Maroon 5. He sings in what sounds like falsetto, but then he never comes out of it and you realize his voice is actually just whiny and womanish. His songs are lame. He is arrogant, and says things like, “I love being naked!” and then proves it by rarely wearing a shirt. His body is scrawny and malnourished-looking, is covered in tattoos and looks “like the wall of a bar bathroom.”

It gets worse. Prior to the last presidential election Levine tweeted, “Dear America, if you don’t re-elect Barack Obama, I’m going to lose my sh*t.” Not a classy gentleman and definitely not sexy.

It isn’t just Levine’s unsexy appearance I find annoying. That’s the least of his problems. It’s the vain way he flaunts himself and manages to be simultaneously cocky and emotional. His behavior is that of a spoiled child and he enjoys talking about his feelings like a female. Maybe that’s why women like him so much.  It’s disturbing. I’m not sure how People chooses its sexiest man or if most women in America approve of this year’s choice. But Levine is popular, has dated multiple Victoria’s Secret models, and is engaged to one currently.

Past sexiest men alive winners include: Hugh Jackman (even his name is manly. And the muscles on this guy? Jacked-Man), George Clooney, Pierce Brosnan, Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, and Mel Gibson. Adam Levine does not belong on the same list as these manly men. He does not deserve to be mentioned in the same breath. What is wrong with women? Has the age of feminism made women so strong that an effeminate man-child is deemed the most desirable of all?

Come back, John Wayne, we miss you.

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