Yesterday's Top Stories

The week that was

The week that was

Helen Hunt Jackson: “By all these lovely tokens September days are here, With summer’s best of weather And autumn’s best of cheer.”

The word of the week was Syria. Whether or not President Assad used chemical weapons, and whether or not the use or non-use thereof warrants American interference was, and remains, the hot topic of debate. Obama made it clear he doesn’t need the blessing of Congress to initiate a military attack, but decided to humor lawmakers by seeking (sort of) Congressional approval. Many are of the same mind as Rand Paul, doubting the effectiveness of Obama’s plan not to go big and then to go home.

Also related to Syria (taking up three paragraphs, since it’s all anyone is talking about), Obama made waves this week when he said, “I didn’t set a red line,” because back in 2012 he said, “We have been very clear to the Assad regime… that a red line for us is we start seeing a whole bunch of chemical weapons moving around or being utilized.” Obama’s conflicting statements have prompted speculation and severe concern that the president may actually be color blind.

Vladimir Putin has vowed that if the United States carry out military strikes against Assad’s regime, Russia will aid Syria. Putin also called Secretary of State John Kerry a liar. Obama initially liked the thought of two enemies for the price of one, and the idea grew on him as he considered how a strong Soviet adversary might remind people of the 1980s, an era many regard with nostalgia.

A Human Events/Gravis original poll shows that half of the voters in Rep. John Boehner’s home district welcome a challenger to the House Speaker. Rumor has it that Boehner may step down in 2014, despite the Speaker having said two months ago that he doesn’t plan on it. Problem is, no one knows whom the Speaker speaks for anymore.

The Fed showed that it doesn’t care for the welfare of its citizens by uncharacteristically declining to stage an intervention. Big Brother announced that it won’t enforce its own laws when it comes to legalized recreational marijuana use, but will instead allow stoners to stay as high as the elevation in Washington State and Colorado.

And in the land of absurdia, the DailyMail (where all worthwhile news is born) enlightened its readers with this headline: “’Sorry mom, I’m STRAIGHT’: Oversharing mother who blogs about her pride in her ‘rainbow boy‘ reveals how other son finally plucked up courage to come out to her as heterosexual.” “Coming out” was once a celebrated occasion for debutantes, and now straights and gays alike can participate, thanks to a “fabulous, gender creative” boy from Orange County.

The end.

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