Politics

NASCAR Nation

The Democrat Party has officially gone too far, cavalierly tossing such a grievous insult at us that Dale Earnhardt’s Junior Nation and Jeff Gordon’s Rainbow Warriors may have to team up to administer a whooppin’.

It wasn’t bad enough that Vice President Al Gore once referred to the conservative wing of the Republican Party as the extra chromosome wing of the Republican party (because mental retardation is such a knee-slapper — right Al?)  Or that Howard Dean would deride all of the southern United States by declaring he wanted to be “the candidate of the guys in the pick up trucks with confederate flags.” No, this is a much greater transgression and unlike the cases of Global Warming Al and Howard “the mouth of Montpelier” Dean, it was committed by a Southerner, and his minions. According to Congressman Bennie Thompson’s (D-MS) staff, “NASCAR Fans are a diseased lot.”

During a recent getaway to the NASCAR races in Talladega, Alabama and Charlotte, North Carolina, staffers for Thompson advised Homeland Security Committee Congressional staffers to get shots for Hepatitis A and B, Diphtheria, Influenza and Tetanus. That’s right, according to the Democrats, in Washington, if you travel into the exotic locales of Northern Alabama and Charlotte, North Carolina to attend a NASCAR race, you might die — not from flying debris coming out of turn 4, but from those disease ridden hayseeds and hicks who go to the races.

I am a huge NASCAR fan. (I won’t reveal who I pull for.) I have been to my fair share of races around the country. In those travels, I have never seen the need for HAZMAT teams, mosquito netting, delousing showers, or Hong Kong-style surgical masks. NASCAR fans are a diseased lot? Are we to believe that this is what John Edwards meant when he referred to two Americas: the diseased and the healthy?

Fellow motor heads, there is something deeper and darker here at work. It’s the invalidation of not just an entire sport but also a culture. NASCAR represents freedom to choose  and family values. It represents big time consumerism on a Sunday after church or on the Saturday Night before. To some of us, the NASCAR culture means pride, patriotism and Southern Comfort. To others, the majority of its fans, me included it means, big loud, engines that burn fossil fuels without catalytic converters or mufflers, being driven by rock solid, patriotic, free enterprise loving, gun owning, regular guys — exactly the type of people that scare the heck out of the lily-livered leftists out there.

It is quite literally where you will find a lot of folks who love, just love, 8 cylindered, internal combustion engines turning 800 horsepower down the front straightaway. It produces a kind of power you don’t hear, but you feel. The first time you go to a race, and you stand along the straight-aways as those 43 cars get up to full speed, is like the first time a girl (or a boy) kissed you — it’s electric, it’s addictive. Potentially infectious—no way.

Take a trip around most track infields and you won’t see a refugee camp like Bennie Thompson’s staff expects.  Instead, most infields are inhabited by fellow fans staying in RV’s or tents. That’s right, they’re camping; enjoying nature as God (and the inventors of internal combustion engines) intended. These are regular folks who will stop and chat with you. They like to barbecue, argue about the best drivers and who is the worst. These folks are friendly, but they are tribal — proudly displaying the flags of their fathers and their drivers. And yes, they drink a lot of beer. But, they also drink a lot of Pepsi, Coca Cola and Mountain Dew too. The fact is, the races aren’t all about slack jawed yokels named Cletus, who are married to their first cousin, wearing bib overalls and toting a shotgun in one hand and a possum in the other — unless of course NASCAR is racing in New Hampshire that weekend. (I am kidding — that’s actually the case in Pennsylvania!)

The problem with Bennie Thompson’s staff admonition about getting yer shots ‘fer you mix with the hicks and hayseeds in ‘Bama and Carolina is it reveals so much of Democrats’ contempt for America. To hear the Pelosi and Reid wing of the Democrat party, all NASCAR fans are racists — all of them hate blacks and Yankees. It’s how they think. Because of course big corporations like Miller Brewing, Budweiser, Home Depot, Toyota, Craftsman, Ford, Chevrolet, DeWalt, M&Ms and AT&T just love to be associated with that kind of crowd right?

But these tolerant liberals made a colossal mistake this time; NASCAR races are attended by millions, I mean millions, (36 races a year, average attendance 200 thousand fans per race and you have millions of fans in attendance.) Add to that the 20 million at home tuning in too and guess what, liberals, these folks vote. And you geniuses in Washington just called them disease ridden. Are you nuts?

Here is the lesson for all the liberals out there, who think you might get sick if you go to a NASCAR race. Don’t go. Stay in Washington or San Francisco or Chicago and just leave the rest of us alone.

Ironically, that’s been the message of the Conservatives for years — ‘Hey DC — leave us alone.’  And to Bennie, Nancy and Harry we all say that next year we’ll remember what you said about us.

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